Freedom to Change
Pretty much everyone who seeks Alexander Technique instruction is looking for some type of change. Maybe they want to improve their posture, reduce tension or alleviate pain; maybe they want help with a specific situation – to be able to work at the computer more comfortably, for instance, or speak confidently in public; or maybe they are generally interested in a mindful approach to personal development. Whatever the reason, some sort of change is desired.
Earlier this year my good friend and Gestalt psychotherapist, Miriam Granthier, introduced me to the Paradoxical Theory of Change. To explain this Gestalt concept, Arnold Beisser states “that change occurs when one becomes what he is, not when he tries to become what he is not. Change does not take place through a coercive attempt by the individual or by another person to change him, but it does take place if one takes the time and effort to be what he is — to be fully invested in his current positions.”
I was very drawn to this idea, and how it relates to my own work with the Alexander Technique.
As I understand it, this means that true change happens only when we give up trying to change (what we might, in the Alexander Technique, call “end-gaining”) and accept where we are now. I see this in practice every day as I work with myself and my students. Once we give up trying to change something directly (“stand up straight” for instance) we open ourselves up to something else much more useful, sustainable and real, and, paradoxically, we are more than likely find ourselves more naturally upright in the process.
I’ve found this wonderful paradox to be very clearly present working with the “freedom directions” developed by Jennifer Roig-Francoli. This fabulous new way of self-directing uses statements – thoughts – to ourselves along the lines of “I am free to walk” or “My neck is free.”
Here’s an example of how I used a “freedom direction” which shows how this works:
A few weeks ago I was preparing myself an early dinner ahead of going out to teach a class. I wasn’t exactly in a hurry, but I was on a timeline, and was somewhat in that “I’ve got to get this done” mode. This was evident to me by the way I was using my body. I recognized the pattern – the tension – and I wanted to get rid of it! I tried working with myself in various ways using Alexander awareness and directions, but nothing was really changing. I realized I was too focused on the result I wanted, even though this is NOT the intent of AT directing – far from it. What I had missed was the crucial step of acknowledging – or accepting – how things actually were in the present moment. I was familiar with “freedom directions” so I suddenly thought to myself, “I am free to make my dinner… ANY WAY I WANT!” giving myself permission to crash around the kitchen if I wished! Interestingly, as soon as I gave myself that freedom, I instantly released tension throughout my body and smiled! I became happier about making dinner – after all if I was free to do it, I was also free not to do it! I realized I had a choice about it and I chose to make my dinner, which paradoxically changed my mood as well as the way I was using my body!
You can find out more about “freedom directions” in this podcast in which Jennifer explains her discovery:
If you have any thoughts on this or the paradoxical theory of change, I’d love to hear them. Please leave your comments in the space below.
Butterfly image courtesy of njaj at FreeDigitalPhotos.net
Photograph of Imogen by Jano Cohen Photography
The Alexander Technique=Freedom!
Yes!!
Wonderful post – so much in it to reflect. I know the hazards of “trying” – whether it is to be someone other than whom I am or to accomplish something that feels effortful. It’s definitely a skill to relax into “what is” and let the next experience emerge. I like the freedom directives, both the term itself and the concept. I have lot to practice here!
Thank you so much, Judy! This is certainly a practice! As I tune into the language I use, both to myself and others, I am noticing how easy it is to slip into “I’m trying…” “I should…” “I have to…” – being mindful of the language we use towards ourselves changes a lot!
I am one to get caught up in trying. In the past few years I have learned to release a lot. I have been able to learn to give myself permission (I am an innate giver) but my tension some times still lies in the receiving end of that permission. I don’t always take my own advice/permission. I am practicing though, and its becoming easier for me now that I know what it is that I am wanting to experience.
It is definitely a practice, and doesn’t always come easily, that’s for sure!
I so appreciate this! There is freedom in every moment if you choose it to be!
<3 Mimi
ps I look forward to your blogs every week on FFF 🙂
YES! So glad you enjoy my blog, Mimi!
I remember my husband having instruction on the AT while he was studying for his Master’s in Theater at UConn. Posture was a big part of his class, from what I remember. I love what you shared! I want to look into the AT more now.
(Happy to have connected with you through Lousie’s FB group “Fabulous and Fearless”)
Improvements in posture are definitely a common outcome from work with the Alexander Technique, and indeed the reason many people choose to study it. How you get there, however, is all about freeing up, giving yourself choices, and releasing those things that don’t serve you well. AT allows us to have great posture by releasing tension, the opposite of how many people think of posture (holding yourself in a position).
I do hope you will look into it!
Thanks for connecting!
How great is that — changing the way we move by changing the way we think about something. I love your example using “free”. It reminds me of Suzie Cheel changing her to-do list to a love-to list.
Thanks, Susan – changing the way we move by changing the way we think is what Alexander Technique is all about!
I have studied the Alexander Technique for years and just find the whole process so profound. I love how it applies to every aspect of your life and once you do get that life is movement and full of our ability to consciously choose we are indeed liberated!
Liberating – that’s the word!
This is a great post with so much to think about! I love the quote, “that change occurs when one becomes what he is, not when he tries to become what he is not.” I will be thinking about this!
Love that quote too 😉
I love pondering paradox and this one is no exception. Thank you for sharing insights about freedom directions. I’m going to think more about this!
It certainly is an interesting one to think about! Glad you find my post thought-provoking.
Yes I love this, and I love Jenniferʻs descriptions of her discoveries about how she and her students respond physiologically to this language. It seems to me that the definition of trauma would be an experience in which you DONʻT have a choice, and that to think this way can profoundly change that physiological state in some way. My version was about possibilities, knowing I have possibilities. Because sometimes it really “feels” like you donʻt, and that feeling can be overwhelming and prevent you from exploring something that is ready and waiting to be explored. THanks so much for sharing this.
Glad you found it interesting. I think many of us, outside of what would be classified as “trauma” put limitations on ourselves all the time so that we “feel” we don’t have choices (possibilities, to use your word). As you say, it is VERY powerful to think that we do have freedom to choose.
Change is one of those things that requires a desire and then a decision. And it makes perfect sense to me that we can’t change into something we are not. Interesting post. A lot of food for thought.
Julieanne Case
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I think you are right about desire and a decision. I think the before that decision (the choice) can take place there needs to be a recognition/acceptance/acknowledgement of what/where we are now, in the present moment.
I understand Jennifer’s viewpoint from my exposure to The Option Method developed by Bruce DiMarsico and his student Frank Mosca, which posits that Happiness, Freedom and Beingness arise together to comprise our true nature. I agree with Jennifer in the interview that using big picture freedom as an AT direction is not an intention but a statement of TRUTH which, when one KNOWS it to be true is a transforming, liberating experience. Never thought of using it as an AT direction though. I can see how it would work well. David Gorman’s work also points in this direction.
Listening to the tape again . . . I hope you will keep exploring this material about Freedom. RR suggests taking a short cut and eliminating the dialogue about freedom. In my experience it is a necessary step since this creates an understanding of the MEANING of the word freedom. Its a big concept and powerful.
Thanks so much for your comments, Christine. I find the application and ideas behind Freedom Directions to be fascinating. I continue to explore for myself and my students, and I’m sure this will feature in future blog posts! I tend to agree with you about including the dialog about freedom and of course the meaning of being free, though I’ve noticed even without that freedom directions tend to have a positive effect. I do feel, with more explanation and understanding, this is enhanced further. I had definitely put a somewhat narrow meaning onto the word free in directions – free of tension, free to move – which is very nice, but adding the element of free will has made a huge difference!
I love this! Yes, we ALWAYS have choice – that is where change can come in once we realize this. Instead of “should” I always replace that one word in the sentence with “if I really wanted to I could” and that is huge. Thanks for this post!
Sounds like you have great self-awareness. I love the way you turned the “should” around!
Yes I find myself doing this whilst working at the PC, “trying” to relax and not get tense. I think thats why mobile devices are so popular so you can really relax whilst using them! I have never tried the Alexander technique but I am very intrigued to know more 🙂 Jennyxxx
Glad I piqued your interest!
Nondoing is so potent. Thanks for this practical example from everyday living. This is where we have the most freedom, I feel: in the preparation of a meal or the cleaning of a bathroom or the driving in rush hour traffic. Trying to get rid of tension is such a trap. Reminding ourselves that we are free to be however we are and do whatever we want however we want to do it — how radical! Great blog post.
Absolutely! Thanks for your comments, Amy. Freedom to clean the bathroom can be a wonderful thing indeed! 😉
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I am so excited to discover this particular post, and am going to share it with my clients right now! thank you for your presence in my world.
I love that you found your way to this one, Victoria. And I LOVE the paradoxical theory of change!